I had the distinct pleasure of dining at a premier eating facility last week:
My 7-year old granddaughter’s elementary school cafeteria.
I admit to feeling immediately anxious when it was suggested that I should spend 25 minutes in a lunch room with Sally and 55 roaring first graders. But I quickly naughtied myself and got over it.
This is what grandmothers do, right?
But there’s a first time for everything, especially when you live out of town. Between finding the school entrance locked (you have to buzz to get in), having to produce an ID and have my picture taken, AND wear a sticker, AND drink chocolate milk, AND sit on a tiny chair, it was a learning opportunity.
I needn’t have worried. The happy cafeteria shook with a kabillion decibels, and I felt a slight bounce as I entered into the overwhelming energy/excitement/joy of the very young. I smiled more in those 25 minutes than I had in the past week. I wanted to gather those cutie pies like fluffy chicks. And, to nibble tater tots with Sally was beyond precious.
I suddenly aspired to be a lunch lady. I wanted to open prepubescent Yeti water bottles, mop up the spills, receive their boisterous hugs, and well, just enjoy their sugar-fueled giggles. One little sweetheart with hair like Madeline’s let me go in front of her in line and advised me to pick the icy dessert. Pure innocence.
Afterwards I wanted to cry. I thought about Sandy Hook and Uvalde. Sally had an intruder drill later that afternoon and she “got to” hide in the arts and crafts closet. I lowered my ambitions for lunch lady. I just want to be present.
When I was in kindergarten, back in the 1960s, we practiced atomic bomb drills by hiding under our pink metal desks. (What were they thinking??) I survived that and I suppose she will, too (although the underside of that pink desk is THE ONLY memory I have of kindergarten).
Today the CDC reported an epidemic of sadness among young girls. Girls. Little girls.
They are struggling with electronic bullying, poor self image, depression, verbal and sexual abuse. Covid disrupted everything. They lost family members. They are taking harmful substances. They are behind in school. They are insecure about their bodies. They feel afraid, alone, and suicidal.
You worry about a lot of things for your kids and grandkids. But sadness? Adults can be sad, and that’s sad. But this is sadder than sad because it is all so wrong. Will Sally and Madeleine and their happy clucking cafeteria friends soon be weighed down with heavy care? When cafeterias fall silent the end must be near.
Today I applied to be a lunch lady. I hear the job pays well.